Where Does Your Penis Belong?, The Perfect Gift for All Your Male Friends

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<i>Where Does Your Penis Belong?</i>, The Perfect Gift for All Your Male Friends

The most necessary book of 2017 has officially been published.

Behold, Where Does Your Penis Belong?, a helpful guide for all the “grown ass men” out there, brought to you by Ashley Simon, Isla Murray and Allison Gore.

Yes, lots of Y-chromosome-bearing humans might say, ”...But why? We know where our genitals belong!” My dudes, if you already know the answer (which is to say, keep yer ding-a-ling in your pants unless it’s consensual sexy time, please), this book isn’t for you. However, if 2017 taught us one thing and one thing only, it’s that there are quite a few men on the planet who desperately need to learn this indispensable lesson.

Harvey Weinstein, Louis C.K., the rest of the really bad guys outed this year and in years past… here’s looking at all of you, adult men.

The best thing about this absolutely exceptional piece of literature is that all of the proceeds go to RAINN, the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network. Not only will any potentially-bad men benefit from this book, the largest anti-sexual violence organization in the country will too!

You can buy Where Does Your Penis Belong? here.

Annie Black is Paste’s social media manager. She likes noodle soups. She does not like bad men. You can follow her on Twitter.